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13th May
I would ramble about in this town again before I left Cambridge, but it began to rain. So, I killed time in Fitzwilliam Museum.
When I was watching the paintings of Brueghel, a clerk of the museum said to me,"How are you? Are you all right?" I wondered if he remembered me. I responded to him,"It's very interesting, isn't it?" I meant that
the peasants' gestures and features are very interesting. He didn't say any more, but his words made me feel relaxed. Maybe I looked strained. I was a little conscious that I was an outsider in this city. I wondered
the mere words of greeting made strangers relaxed.
After I bought the book,"Gissing In Context" at Heffers, I had lunch at the Counter Restaurant. I dropped in Mrs.Barden's house to take my luggage with me. I started at 3:30 p.m. by bus and arrived at 6 p.m. at
Victoria Bus Station in London. I went to the Hotel Eden.
I asked about Mr.M at the front desk, for I supposed that he had already come back from his Europe tour. I was told that his room number was 307. I went there. I saw a Japanese at the door of the room. I had a chat with him
for a while in the room. Maybe he was mistaken for Mr.M. His name was Y and three younger than M-kun. He was a teacher in a junior high school for a year, but he resigned and came to England. He would take an intensive
course at King's School in Bournemouth from 20th of May. It seemed that he didn't want to tell what subject he had taught.
I asked at the front desk again. M-kun hadn't arrived here yet. I had dinner with Mr.Y at a restaurant nearby. He didn't say anything about himself so much. I didn't understand why he had come to England. I didn't think
I would get along well with him.
I was waiting for M-kun at the lobby till late at night, but he didn't come back.
14th May
After breakfast, I asked about M-kun at the front desk. I was told his room number. When I would go up to his room on the fourth floor, I found him standing at the entrance.
Mr.Y said that he would go to Leister. When he was going to check out, he found that he didn't have his wallet with him. He said that there was fifty thousand yen in it, and hurried up the stairs to look for it in his room.
Leaving our luggages at the hotel, M-kun and I went to the Information Office at Victoria Station. It was a little past ten o'clock. People were standing in a long queue. He went sightseeing in London Zoo. After waiting for
forty-five minutes, I was recommended this guesthouse: Mrs.Savich, 35 Cromwell Grove W.6. near Shepherd Bush Station of Central Line Underground. B&B, £3.00 per one night. I see a desk, a chair and an armchair. I find it good
that this room has a desk, though it is small.
Having made a promise to see M-kun at 1:30 p.m. at Hotel Eden, I got off at Queenaway, and walked through Kensington Garden to the hotel. It was very fine. There were many people sitting on benches.
I talked with M-kun at a bar in the hotel till half past two. It didn't seem that he had enjoyed himself in the Europe tour, for he couldn't get along well with the travelling companions. He was given leave to stay in this country again
only for a month against his expectation after two hours' inquiry at Dover last night.
There are five or six high flat buildings around here. I think a lot of houses for the people working in London stand in the suburb.
This room is on the second floor. I might reach out my hand to touch one of the sprays. I wish I could learn English(hearing and speaking) for another year! ...I must leave here in a week.
15th May
My main job today was to fetch those heavy luggages.
There were many tourists at the Speakers' Corner in Hyde Park. Soon after I arrived there(about ten o'clock), a man said in a loud voice,"I say today English's the best." People surrounded him. He began to make a speech.
I couldn't hear all of what he was saying. People asked him various questions. Every time he responded to a question or to an objection, there was a laughter. I supposed that he gave a ready witted or humorous reply.
Three or four men were speaking when I left there at about eleven o'clock.
I walked to the Victoria Coach Station. If I had not eaten sandwiches at the buffet, I couldn't have brought back the luggages, which weighed 27kg. It began to rain on the way, but it was a fine rain. I didn't get wet so much.
I went to British Museum. It opens at 2:30 p.m. and closes at 6:00 p.m. on Sundays. I found famous writers' manuscripts and letters displayed in the room I stepped in first. I got interested in E.Brontё's manuscript of poems.
A room of relics in Egypt, a room of sculptures in Greece, .....etc. I couldn't look round all in a short time.
16th May
I went to the office of SIA. I must stay overnight at Singapore on my way back to Japan. My passport was valid only for United Kingdom. I asked about my passport, but the answer was "I don't know." So I thought I would go to
the Japanese Embassy.
I walked to Grosvenor Place in the west of Buckingham Palace because it was situated on Grosvenor Street. I was looking for it, but in vain. I asked an elderly postman and I knew that Grosvenor Street was near New Bond Street.
I lost about an hour. My passport was amended to include Singapore as destination. I paid £1.30 for the fee. The clerk was kind, not stereotyped like those who treat one with indifference. He gave me a receipt saying
"Don't hurry up so. Would you have a cup of tea?" I said,"No, thank you." and went out of the Embassy. I think it was half past one.
I entered a Japanese restaurant,"Saga" nearby. I hadn't eaten a Japanese dish for three months. I found an Englishman drinking sake and I wanted to drink it. Only a small bottle of sake made me get drunk. I ordered tonkatsu and rice.
It tasted good. I realized that Japanese rice was good.
I talked a little with a Japanese gentleman next to me. He was half in his forties. He didn't say what job he was engaged in, but he told me about the Japanese economy. He seemed to have difficulty in communicating with people in this
country. I couldn't understand him enough for ten minutes.
I went to British Museum again. I was told that I must fill out an application form to enter the Reading Room. It will take a long time to get the admission. It's impossible. I'll leave here in a week.
I watched "King Lear" at Oldwych Theatre. I was moved very much. Donald Sinden played King Lear wonderfully. He showed me an another Lear I had imagined in my mind. I was satisfied with his acting.
It was directed by Trevor Nunn. He gave us an additional scene that a few beggars were kicked down mercilessly by soldiers. I agreed with him. In the scene,Division of Kingdom, Lear felt repulsion against Goneril, and Cordelia showed
an opposing attitude toward her elder sisters. Michael William played the part of Fool. His acting was very persuasive. I think that the fool is not young but elderly in "King Lear".
17th May
Got off at Bank Street. Crossed London Bridge. From The White Hart Inn and The George Inn to The Tower of London. Visited Dickens House. Bought a travellingbag at Woolworth on Oxford Street. Came back at 6:00 p.m.
It looked like rain when I went out in the morning, but it didn't rain. The sun sometimes shone out in the afternoon.
Loneliness. Lack of something. My life in the future...
What will I do tomorrow?
I'll read a book.
I was moved last night. Edgar says in the last of the play.
The weight of this sad time we must obey.
Speak what we feel, not what we ought to say.
D.H.Lawrence says in "Lady Chatterley's Lover".Ours is essentially a tragic age, so we refuse to take it tragically.
We must live and learn.
I went sightseeing in Windsor. I left Paddington Station and changed trains at Slough. It didn't take more than an hour.
Windsor Castle seemed to be the biggest of all the castles I had ever seen in Britain.All the rooms looked gorgeous.I thought that interior decorators there were of great worth, and that Great Britain had had a great property, though
it is said to have declined. A man of vulgar taste was summing up the admission fee for a year. It will be appropriated for the maintenance of the building.
I remember the big diamond and many other jewels displayed in Tower of London and those gorgeous decorators I saw today. I suppose that the glittering fortune wasn't made without merciless means.
I hear that a lot of foreign tourists are coming to England because of low prices. I think the amount of foreign money is large.
It was very fine today! There weren't any clouds in the sky all day long.
I like English rivers. Rivers in Japan have a little high banks because there were many floods repeatedly in the past. Rivers here seem to have no banks. There are trees along a river and a tree such as a willow is hanging down its
sprays over the surface of the water. Such a sight makes my mind relaxed.
I looked at Magna Carta and Kennedy's Monument. I should think I had a good experience because I went sightseeing as tourists did, but I feel something unsatisfied.
What kind of life I will live in Japan.
I came back to Paddington. I walked through Kensington Garden to Queensway Station and came home by tube.
When I was walking in the park, I caught sight of a squirrel. I followed it for a while. I found that it was carrying pieces of biscuit to its secret place. All creatures are making every effort to live in this world.
19th May
I went to Victoria Station to weigh my luggage. It weighed more than 20kg. I thought I had to take a little more books with me into an airplane.
I exchanged one hundred dollars for pounds at Barclays Bank nearby. That will be sufficient for my living expences for the five days in London.
I was eating a light lunch sitting on a bench in a park near my guesthouse. A little kid came near and sat at the other end of the bench I was sitting on. The bench was for four persons. He was swinging his legs for a few minutes not
looking at me. Suddenly he ran away across the lawn. His trousers looked dirty. I wondered if he felt hungry. I felt somewhat suffocated by becoming conscious of the boy. Why couldn't I speak to him frankly?
In the afternoon, I read "King Lear" for two hours sitting on a bench in Kensington Garden.
I walked along Kensington Church Street. Though the colour of the street on a map showed a shopping street, I didn't feel that it had an atomosphere of shopping.
I walked to Queensway. It was a bustling street. There were many Chinese restaurants on the street. I saw Arabic language newspapers at a news vending place. Queensway had quite a different atomosphere from Bond St. or Regent St.
I entered a Chinese restaurant at the corner where Queensway and Bayswater Road acrossed. I saw a piece of roast pork on fried rice. The fried rice didn't taste good because it wasn't Japanese rice, but I got a full stomach. A Chinese tea
was served. It smelt the same as a tea N-kun gave me a few years ago. He bought it when he went to China. It hadn't been my favorite smell. I did want to drink a Japanese tea.
When I went out of the restaurant, one of the waiters said to me,"Arigatougozaimashita." I wondered if he was a Japanese. He judged me as a Japanese by my looks. It's difficult for me to tell a Chinese from a Japanese only by the looks.
20th May
Today, I went only to National Gallery. I was going to Regent Park, but I stopped going there, for it began to rain when I went out of National Gallery at about three o'clock.
I found a big bookshop, Foyles, on Charing Cross Road. I bought Gissing's novels published in Harvester Press, "Our Friend the Charlatan"(£5.95), "Sleeping Fires"(£5.65) and "Thyza"(£7.50).
To tell the truth, I want to go back to Japan as soon as possible. Though life is hard, I'm not afraid of any matter what may come.
21th May
Contrary to my imagining Holland Park as a miniature of Hyde Park, it was quite different. There were also peacocks and cranes. I felt as if I were walking through a forest. I thought that lovers wouldn't fail to whisper romantic words to each other in the park.
I walked to Portobello Road Market. The street was crowded with shoppers, the majority of whom were tourists from other countries. I saw several chartered buses. I went off the road and when I was walking toward a station of underground,
I came across a newly-married couple being taken pictures of in front of a Russian church.
I took a tube from Ladbroke Grove St. to Angel St. I looked in Camden Passage Antique Market. I entered into Regent Park by way of Bake Street. I didn't enter the zoo. Queen Mary's Gardens was wonderful.
I walked to Carnaby Street near Regent Street. The street's famous for The Beatles. I didn't feel anything in particular. If I had been with O-kun, he might have been impressed very much.
I walked to Trafalgar Square to enter National Gallery again, but I looked in National Portrait Gallery. And there, I could watch the original 'picture of Brontё sisters' and 'portrait of Emily Brontё' by Bramwell Brontё. I remembered the explanation
of that at The Brontё Parsonage Museum in Haworth.
At night, I watched "King Lear" again at Oldwych Theatre. I was less moved this time, but I could watch the gestures and looks of the characters, of Fool in particular. I also got interested in the various lights in the drama. I found that the lights
might show us a battlefield from the visual point of Gloucester who had lost his sight.
22th May
I went to the speakers corner in Hyde Park. The man, who had said,"English is the best in the world." the previous time, was making a speech on the same theme. The most interesting thing was that he responded to an American tourist,"Yes, you are right.
Yankee went to the moon. But, Englishmen would come back quickly finding that there isn't anything but dust."
I went along The Serpentine and crossed it on the way and when I came to Albert Memorial, I found some groups walking with a flag describing MAYC(Methodist Association of Youth Club). They probably came together from various districts. I wondered what
they would make an appeal.
After that, by way of Piccadilly Circus, I walked along Regent St. and Oxford St., and took a tube at Marble Arch and came back.
It has been very fine these days. We can't see any clouds in the sky. This fine weather will continue. I hear June and July are the most perfect months of the whole year, at least when we have anything like a summer.
I'm going to leave this country tomorrow. Probably I won't come back again, at least in ten years. I'll study English hard for ten years in Japan. I want to come here again and I will have to speak more fluently.
I've had a various and precious experiences for three months. I think I must thank many people I met here in England.
Fare thee well, my Youth.
And come up to me, new Youth.
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